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    April 28

    马利宝

    任何的聚会,只要增加了1,2个陌生人,我常常就会显得无所适从。坐在沙发的角落,抬眼望去,满池的红男绿女,纸醉金迷,逼仄的空间夹杂着情欲的味道。一丝一缕地在空气中暗暗浮动。T台上的女孩衣着暴露,举手投足间尽是万种风情,夸张的肢体语言,娇媚的表情无不挑逗着男人的神经。
     
    蓦然回首,红颜暗与流年换。
     
    总是会有人看到我的局促,“玩色子会不会?吹牛?”“好啊。”对酒精敏感,所以一直都很懂得适可而止,只是遇到对手便会失了分寸。白色的马利宝,入口微甜,再渐渐品出苦味,就好象是爱情,前味是浓郁的甜蜜,中味是平滑,后味则是微酸涩口的苦。一直输,一直又固执地要求再来一回。眼睛渐渐开始模糊,起身去厕所洗把脸,再回来的时候身边的人开始一对一对搂在一起。剩作我一个缩回角落。意识渐渐开始溃散的时候要懂得赶快逃离。
     
    很多人都说,你即便是醉酒的时候,也是相当的乖巧,不哭,不闹,亦不多话,只是安静地坐在角落或者是睡觉,不似有的人,醉后满嘴胡言,大呼小叫,哭得肝肠寸断,吐得一塌糊涂,形象全无。笑。心里却是微微有些恨意的,长久以来一直习惯压抑自己,即便是醉酒也是醉得那样理智,不肯放肆地宣泄一回。
     
    别给自己设了框,我懂失去的悲伤。
     
    一直都以为,任何感情一旦夹杂了情欲便会变得肮脏,柏拉图式的精神恋爱才能使感情稳固长久。只是,我们保持了身体的童贞又能换来怎样的结局,没有在感情最好的时候交付彼此,想来亦是心有不甘。倘若以后,在你怀里的人再不是我,我能不能卸掉防备,尽情地醉一回?

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    改版了?白白的看起来好很多呢。。
    Apr. 29

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